Jingo, Terry Pratchett

As every student of exploration knows, the prize goes not to the explorer who first sets foot upon the virgin soil but to the one who gets that foot home first. If it is still attached to his leg, this is a bonus.


After all, when you seek advice from someone it's certainly not because you want them to give it. You just want them to be there while you talk to yourself.


It is a long-cherished tradition among a certain type of military thinker that huge casualties are the main thing. If they are on the other side then this is a valuable bonus.


One of the universal rules of happiness is: always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.


It was much better to imagine men in some smoky room somewhere, made mad and cynical by privilege and power, plotting over the brandy. You had to cling to this sort of image, because if you didn't then you might have to face the fact that bad things happened because ordinary people, the kind who brushed the dog and told their children bedtime stories, were capable of then going out and doing horrible things to other ordinary people. It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was Us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No-one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.


You meet people one at a time, they seem decent, they got brains that work, and then they get together and you hear the voice of the people. And it snarls.


Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.


It is in the deserts and high places that religions are generated. When men see nothing but bottomless infinity over their heads they have always had a driving and desperate urge to find someone to put in the way.


The intelligence of that creature known as a crowd is the square root of the number of people in it.


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